A Message from your Cat: I NEED This Accordion Scratcher Toy with Ball

Dear Human,  Meow. We need to talk.  I have discovered this accordion cat toy, I believe purchasing it would be a purr-fect decision.  It folds. It expands. It has the smell of a box, THERE IS A BALL. Frankly, I’m pawsitive this was invented specifically for me.  Consider the benefits. Every minute I spend attacking this toy is a minute I’m not sitting in the hallway intimidating the dog and denying passage without the appropriate toll.  My knife fingers will finally have somewhere to go besides the door frames. Your couch may even get a vacation from my ongoing upholstery renovation project. I know you liked its original shape, but I had notes.  It’s new and sealed, includes a ball, and provides hours of feline entertainment.  So quit kitten around and buy it.  Purr my last email.  Sincerely, The Cat CEO of Knife Fingers Hallway Security & Furniture Remodeling Department